Lemme tell you something…

Posts tagged “wife

CONFESSION

by_the_river_by_apetruk-d4v0ge8
Art by APetruk

CONFESSION

by E.C. McMullen Jr.

Copyright 2013

After the harrowing, brutal car chase across the county, speeding at night through a downpour, it all came to an immediate end when Jesse’s Chrysler slid off the road and slammed into a tree.

Anyone else surviving such a crash would cautiously check themselves for damage, but not Jesse. Jesse knew he was hurt bad, but if Daniel caught him, he’d be dead.

Jesse ran limping into the cold rain and dark woods. His heart was drumming in his chest. His head was pounding from the elevated blood pressure and the last squirts of adrenalin. Jesse was wounded, exhausted, used up, and along came Daniel from behind, casually holding his lantern; as if enjoying a pleasant walk in the stormy night.

It only took a moment of that bright light falling on Jesse’s face for his button-black pupils to shrink to pinholes and the woods to go dark. Doubly frightened, Jesse turned to run, only to painfully slam into a tree.

That’s how Daniel found Jesse, cowering on the ground, bleeding, unarmed and face to face with the husband of his lover.

Considering the night and everything that led up to this moment, Daniel, having the drop on Jesse at gunpoint, looked upon his foe with an expression of odd curiosity.

It was that lantern-lit curious expression, as if Daniel was looking at a strange bug, that infuriated the beaten Jesse. Accepting his defeat, he began confessing,

“Okay! Okay! I did it! But Tina and me are in love, man! Your wife loves me! Me! And why do you even care? When was the last time you loved her? Held her? Do you even remember? Do you?”

Daniel said nothing but thumbed back the hammer on his revolver. Jesse flinched, throwing his hands over his face.

“Fine! Fine!” Jesse shouted in tears. He was a dead man anyway, what did he have to lose? “We fucked! Okay? Is that what you want to hear you maniac?”

Only the clattering, splattering noise of the rain, and silence from Daniel. Jesse despised that smug confidence.

In a flash, Jesse thought of the slimmest opportunity. Make Daniel lose his shit. Make him angry. Make him sloppy. Make Daniel want to drop that gun and punch his enemy in the face. Despite his injuries, Jesse was certain that if he could just get close enough to grab Daniel, he’d make short work of the little cuckhold.

“I fucked her and she loved it!” Jesse shouted. “We did everything! We did it all! She was going to leave you for me! For me, you needle-dicked shit!”

Jesse’s words weren’t having the expected result. Daniel wasn’t reacting: No rage, no jealousy, nothing to make him lose control and possibly give Jesse an edge. Daniel only raised his brows. “I must admit, I’m amazed.”

Jesse lowered his hands, confused. There was just no figuring Daniel out.

“Your confession,” Daniel said. “I’m surprised you didn’t at least try and talk your way out of it; convince me I had the wrong guy.”

Jesse blinked in surprise, as clearly this was an unconsidered option.

“Would that have worked?”

Daniel shrugged,

“I would have given it a shot.”

BANG!

Story by E.C. McMullen Jr.

Artwork

By the river by ~APetruk on deviantART


pb300Don’t get caught without my book

PERPETUAL BULLET: A Science Fiction Collection.

It’s a veritable trove of previously published Science Fiction Horror Thriller tales – plus bonus stories

Featuring: Weird Sex, True Love, Monsters and Mayhem!

Now on sale for $9.00 in Trade Paperback and in eBook for $1.99 and available for your Android Tablet, iPad, Kindle, Nook, and every other “E”!

Find it at (Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Diesel, !ndigo, iTunes, KoboBooks, Smashwords, WHSmith, and more).

Buy the paperback at Amazon and the Kindle eBook is free!

Got more time to kill? Buy WILLOW BLUE. It’s my second collection of critically acclaimed Supernatural and Drama Thriller short stories with all of the Weird Sex, True Love, Monsters and Mayhem, you’ve come to expect (or should by now). Available in paperback for $8.00 or in Kindle for only $1.99. Buy the paperback at Amazon and the Kindle eBook is free! The tales will last you longer than latte!

Crave even more?

Look for my story Cedo Looked Like People, in the anthology, FEAR THE REAPER, edited by Joe Mynhardt. Available from Crystal Lake Publishing and available in Print for $12.99 or eBook for $2.99.

Also available from Crystal Lake Publishing, the film making guidebook, HORROR 201: The Silver Scream. Reap the rewards of movie making experience from the likes of Myself, as well as  John Carpenter, Tom Holland, Jeffrey Reddick, George A. Romero, Keith Arem, Richard Gray, also the late  Ray Bradbury, Wes Craven, plus many more. $19.99 in Print or $3.99 in eBook.

Advertisements

3-ALARM FIREWALL

ECWife (at her computer): “Netflix is telling me to upgrade my media player.”
Me (distracted, at my computer): “So do it.”
Wife: “Okay.”
Me (my inner Peter Lorre voice shouts in my head “Wake up you fool! 3-Alarm Firewall Emergency!!!): “Wait it’s YOU! *DON’T* do it!”
Wife: “What?!?”
Me (rushing over): “Let me see!” (an obvious Spyware/phishing/virus pop-up against a grey background) “NOOO! Shit! You didn’t do anything, did you?”
Wife: “No, I-!”
Me: “Good, just get out of there!”
Wife: (reaches for the keyboard)
Me:*DON’T TOUCH*!!! I mean YOU get out of THAT chair!”
Wife: “Fine! FINE! WTF?”
Me: “This isn’t Netflix! Look! Does the address bar *say* Netflix?!?”
Wife: “Hm. No, but so what?”
Me (Exasperated): “SO?!? (POINT! POINT! POINT!) WHAT?!? (POINT! POINT! POINT!) So NETFLIX Isn’t Telling You SHIT!”
Wife: “Very dramatic. Jesus, what an actor.”
Me: “GAH!!!”
I hard close the browser then run Spybot. Then I run anti-virus. Then I specifically Live scan the Firefox browser just in case something got by the regular scan. Firefox should have caught this and not allowed it. Then again, her Netcraft toolbar should have blocked it as well.

I re-open Firefox (do *not* clear cookies. I need to fully track this bastard down!). Because of the hard close, the code anticipates a possible problem and gives me a list of boxes to choose from – ones to remove or keep as it safely brings up all open tabs.

There it is. My wife mis-typed Netflix and typed Nexflex instead. Nexflex is an attack site which redirects to the attack page hosted by, of course, puercos.org.

puercos.org is run out of Panama and as far as I’ve ever seen, does nothing but redirect to hosted Internet assholes out to zombify your computer.

Unfortunately, my wife thinks I’m over-reacting. We have an anti-virus software to protect her computer, so what’s the big deal?

She says this, even while her virus-damaged netbook (The one I was POINTing atdestroyed just last month. Waiting for me to buy a new hard drive for it to restore its former glory) sits next to her. My wife is smart about many things, but not the Internet. Worse: She never knows, she never learns, and she never cares (about the workings of computers and cars. I just don’t get this blasé attitude she has for equipment she relies upon so much).

I swear I could actually feel a brown hair in my beard burn to gray. Or maybe it was another age line slicing it’s way across my face.

SHEESH!


I’ve No Idea

ECI’VE NO IDEA
Copyright 2013 by E.C. McMullen Jr.

I’m alone most of today, it’s lunch time, so I go to the fridge to see what we’ve got.

I start moving things around… around…

Hm.

This clear glass container with a plastic lid.

What is this stuff?

I open the lid to get a better look. Yuck.

What the hell is this stuff?

This doesn’t look like food. Not any food I would eat.

In fact, it’s so repulsive looking that I won’t even give it the sniff test. I mean, if it smells as bad as it looks?

My brain’s ID configuration confused, my imagination takes over and that’s when things get worse.

It looks like… like something that belongs in someone. Yet here it is in a pudding of gooey vegetables. I guess they’re vegetables. Asparagus kind of string bean tomatoes? But the main thing. The kind of centerpiece to it all. I’ve no idea.

I mean, of course, it’s not a brain or heart or any recognizable organ like that. But it still looks like some… Thing … that a person shouldn’t, or couldn’t, do without.

I just got a shiver looking at it. Well screw this, I definitely don’t like it and I’m feeling a little ticked at my wife for putting this damn thing in our refrigerator of all places. This doesn’t belong with food. It creeps me right the hell out.

What’s the damn point of having this disgusting thing in our refrigerator?

By this time my mind, running all over the place, throwing volumes of stored memory this way and that in search for an explanation, still hasn’t figured out what I’m looking at. It’s so bizarre my hand holding the container, is nearly moving by itself further from my face. As if the damn thing might leap at me like the facehugger in ALIEN.

So what do I do?

I cover it back up, put it back inside the refrigerator, and close the door firm, that’s what I do.

That damn thing is just wrong. Wrong!

It’s so unexpected, so unrecognizable, and I’m surprised that I’m getting emotional about it. I’m scared, angry, frustrated at not being able to identify it, and hurt: that my wife would put something like that in there.

What kind of person would do that?

Oh for fuck sake, what the hell is wrong with Me? With all of the great years we’ve been together, Lucy loves me, that’s a fact. A few days ago when I slipped in the rain and cracked my head, hell, she was the one crying.

Now I’m kinda glad I’m alone. No one can see me turn into such a sniveling baby over some spoiled food in the fridge. Jesus, dude. Get a grip!

Lucy will be home soon. She’ll have a sound, calm explanation of whatever that thing, that god damn thing is, and I’ll have a private laugh over my drama queen imagination.

…and paranoia.

Yeah. My wife will be home soon and that crap in the refrigerator will make sense. I’ll dispense with my overreaction so much that, once I know what it is, I’ll probably even eat it.

Ha! Yeah! It is likely part of something we already ate! It’s just a stupid leftover, that’s all! That makes all the sense in the world!

Well, definitely lost my appetite. I’m back in my room with my computer to wait for my wife.

Now I am writing this goofy blog, letting everyone know. Hey, we can all be idiots sometimes, right?

Lucy will be home soon and balance my world again. That’s what couples do. Keep each other on keel.

She’ll know what that is.

You know, she prefers to change my bandages instead of letting me do it. I can never put the fresh ones back on just right. She also checks my stitches as the angle is on the back of my head. Man, I really walloped myself good. Lucy loves me and I’m a fool for getting so scared.

The cat is in my lap. The dog is near my feet, Lucy will be home soon. All is right with the world.

Except down the hall in the kitchen, some unknown god damn Thing in a jar is squatting among the food we eat.

Why can’t I bring myself to describe the ugly mess? Well, I think I’d go nuts. “That way leads to madness.” as they used to say.

Wait. Wasn’t I just over this? What, am I slipping? This is absurdly childish. I’m too old and grown up for this nonsense.

Yet I am still fixating on that crap in my house, in the fridge, in the cold, in the dark, currently unseen among all the other food That I Eat.

Whew!

I could leave the house.

I’ll take the cat and dog with me.

Because, well, they shouldn’t be left alone with that thing.

Oh god, damn it! Stop stupidly obsessing, fool! Why am I being so weak?

Lucy will be here soon. I’m not going to call her! I’m not going to ask about that shit in the fridge. This whole blown-all-out-of-proportion matter I’ve created has me on edge and she knows me. She’d hear the fear in my voice. She’d want me to go back to the hospital.

No, way. Not over something I just know is going to have a normal, even mediocre reason, for being in this house.

I could take a photo of it and put it online.

My friends could probably identify it and then, well, then everything would be okay.

No.

I’m not going to do that.

What would I do if they can’t identify it? What if They freaked out? That would shoot my paranoia into overdrive.

Or worse, what if they can identify it and that fucking thing has every reason to send me over the edge?

Christ! The more I think about it, the more incriminating it is. God damn I wish I knew what the hell it was!

What?

What was that?

Oh, it’s just the fucking floorboards creaking. Old house and all. The dog would be barking his head off, the cat would be upright and hissing if anything weird was happening.

Why do I feel so scared and confused?

God damn, it! Chill out, man!

Just chill the hell out.

Everything will be okay.

My wife will be home soon.

END

Copyright 2013, E.C. McMullen Jr.


wb2016Don’t wait another moment to find more stories in my book,
WILLOW BLUE.
It’s my second collection of critically acclaimed Supernatural and Drama Thriller short stories with all of the Weird Sex, True Love, Monsters and Mayhem, you’ve come to expect (or should by now). Available in paperback for $8.00 or in Kindle for only $1.99. Buy the paperback at Amazon and the Kindle eBook is free! The tales will last you longer than latte!

Want to raise your fear factor?

PERPETUAL BULLET: A Science Fiction Collection.
It’s a veritable trove of previously published Science Fiction Horror Thriller tales – plus bonus stories
Featuring: Weird Sex, True Love, Monsters and Mayhem!
Now on sale for $9.00 in Trade Paperback and in eBook for $1.99 and available for your Android Tablet, iPad, Kindle, Nook, and every other “E”!
Find it at (Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Diesel, !ndigo, iTunes, KoboBooks, Smashwords, WHSmith, and more).
Buy the paperback at Amazon and the Kindle eBook is free!

Fill those bare shelf spaces!

Look for my story Cedo Looked Like People, in the anthology, FEAR THE REAPER, edited by Joe Mynhardt. Available from Crystal Lake Publishing and available in Print for $12.99 or eBook for $2.99.

Also available from Crystal Lake Publishing, the film making guidebook, HORROR 201: The Silver Scream. Reap the rewards of movie making experience from the likes of Myself, as well as  John Carpenter, Tom Holland, Jeffrey Reddick, George A. Romero, Keith Arem, Richard Gray, also the late  Ray Bradbury, Wes Craven, plus many more. $19.99 in Print or $3.99 in eBook.


If I want something for Christmas, I’ll get it myself

ECThis is how it works with me.

Wife: What are you doing? Don’t buy that!

Me: My kit is about depleted, sweet. I need new leather polish. Also my chin has more hairs than my shoe brush.

Wife: But it might be a Christmas present!

Me: That’s a month away.

Wife: Hon-neee!!!

Me: Sigh. Fine.

Wife: Where are you going?

Me: I need to restock the hexes in my tool box. They’re getting pretty round.

Wife: But you might be getting new tools for Christmas!

Me: Oh, Come On!