Lemme tell you something…

Posts tagged “fear

The Scary Cupcake

Mother Warned Me
Copyright 2018 by E.C. McMullen Jr.

MySpooky Street

Copyright 2018 E.C. McMullen Jr.

When I was young and in the military and we were off-duty, winding down the adrenaline of our second wind so we could sleep, sometimes we’d sit around eating and drinking our junk from the gedunk machines. When we did this, we’d get all philosophical.

Now to a 19 or 20 year old our philosophy went something like this,
“What are you going to do when you get out?”
“What is the one thing you haven’t done?”
“What is the line you’ll never cross?”
or the next question,
“What scares you the most?”

Then the round robin would begin as the question was answered, person by person around the haphazard circle.

What Scares You The Most?

I learned early on that fear is subjective. One person will be scared by something another finds harmless, even ridiculous.

It was here that I first developed the idea of a scary cupcake.

Suppose you knew of a person who lived all alone in an apartment, bungalow, or house and you wanted to do something nice for them.

At the same time, you know there must be a reason for their solitude so you don’t want to be pushy – infringe.

So one night, flush with compassion, you make some cupcakes. You look at what you’ve made, find the best-looking one, take it to their door, quietly knock, and leave.

You just want your neighbor to know that someone out there cares.

What you don’t know is that your neighbor is going through some high-octane introverted mind-fuckery on an epic Edgar Allan Poe scale and you just became the Raven.

Edgar Allan Poe

You’re already gone, warmly wishing that your little gift is well received. Meanwhile, your neighbor has only now screwed up enough courage to respond to the void,

Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,
“Sir,” said I, “or Madam, truly your forgiveness I implore;”

Who knows how far they felt their bubble of solitude reached. Within the confines of their home? Beyond their apartment or house? The entirety of their lot or property? Then in the deepest darkness of Their night, they heard a knock.

“But the fact is I was napping, and so gently you came rapping,
And so faintly you came tapping, tapping at my chamber door,
That I scarce was sure I heard you”—here I opened wide the door;—
Darkness there and nothing more.

Yet while Edgar may have found himself

Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing,
Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before

Your neighbor just ratcheted up the paranoia factor. Because your neighbor’s mind isn’t playing tricks. There really was someone there. Someone who knocked then vanished and the evidence of this is plain.

There in the moonlight on the doorstep sits one solitary cupcake on a dish.

One Scary Cupcake.

It’s scary not because of what it is but of what it means to your neighbor.

‘Someone put that there: Someone who wants to remain anonymous, unknown, unseen. Someone wants me to know they’re watching me. Oh God! They could be hidden in the dark, watching me right now! This single fragile little cupcake with its bright frosting and little candy sprinkles: Is that what they think of me?’

Such thinking is not without precedent. When a VooDoo Bokor nails a dead chicken to your door, the message is not, “I thought you might be hungry. Please enjoy this chicken with my well-wishes, signed, Your Secret Admirer.”

So back in the military, trading spooky stories of what scared us, I learned that fear can be unique to the individual.

A long time later in life, during an otherwise uneventful moment, I had an unexpected flash of insight.

I realized I’d become the person my Mother always warned me about.

This revelation came to me one night while I was visiting her.

There she sat in the warm comfort of her kitchen on a dark summer night, having no idea that the Monster one must avoid was standing right next to her. The Creature hugged her, brought her ice tea, and kissed her on the top of her head.

Why?

Because the Horror loves his Mother.

Unaware of the danger, she spoke to the 6.2 Thing that towered over her diminutive 5 foot frame, “Aw… Thank you, My little Eddie!”

END

Story by E.C. McMullen Jr.


wb2016Perhaps you’ll find your fear in my book,
WILLOW BLUE?
It’s my second collection of critically acclaimed Supernatural and Drama Horror Thriller short stories with all of the Weird Sex, True Love, Monsters and Mayhem, you’ve come to expect (or should by now). Available in paperback for $8.00 or in Kindle for only $1.99. Buy the paperback at Amazon and the Kindle eBook is free! The tales will last you longer than latte!

Wish to hoard horror? My book
PERPETUAL BULLET: A Science Fiction Collection.
Is a veritable trove of previously published Science Fiction Horror Thriller tales – plus bonus stories
Featuring: Weird Sex, True Love, Monsters and Mayhem!
Now on sale for $9.00 in Trade Paperback and in eBook for $1.99 and available for your Android Tablet, iPad, Kindle, Nook, and every other “E”!
Find it at (AmazonBarnes & NobleDiesel!ndigoiTunesKoboBooksSmashwordsWHSmith, and more).
Buy the paperback at Amazon and the Kindle eBook is free!

Enrich your library with frights!

Look for my story Cedo Looked Like People, in the anthology, FEAR THE REAPER, edited by Joe Mynhardt. Available from Crystal Lake Publishing and available in Print for $12.99 or eBook for $2.99.

Drink from the well of scares!

Also available from Crystal Lake Publishing, the film making guidebook, HORROR 201: The Silver Scream. Reap the rewards of movie making experience from the likes of Myself, as well as  John Carpenter, Tom Holland, Jeffrey Reddick, George A. Romero, Keith Arem, Richard Gray, also the late  Ray Bradbury, Wes Craven, plus many more. $19.99 in Print or $3.99 in eBook.

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So Scary

SO SCARY
Copyright 2017 by E.C. McMullen Jr.

RedDeath

Death: “RON? ALL RIGHT, SERIOUSLY RON, YOU NEED TO LISTEN TO ME, AND I THINK I SPEAK FOR DEATH WHEN I SAY THIS-”

Death: “WE REALLY SHOULD HAVE A BETTER WAY OF IDENTIFYING OURSELVES.”

Death: “I DON’T SEE WHY. I CAN’T EVER REMEMBER BEING IN THIS SITUATION BEFORE.”

Ron: “It would help me.”

Death: “OH HOW CAN IT POSSIBLY HELP YOU? I MEAN, LOOK AT YOU, YOU HAVE DEATH AT EVERY SHOULDER AND WE’RE NOT EVEN THE ONES YOU’RE AFRAID OF.”

Death: “I’M SLOW AND PAINFUL. TO YOUR RIGHT IS QUICK AND PAINLESS.”

Ron: “I’ll take quick and painless.”

Death: “IT DOESN’T WORK THAT WAY.”

Death: “RON, CONSIDER THE FACT THAT THE PRESENCE OF ACTUAL PHYSICAL DEATH AT YOUR SHOULDER IS NOT SCARING YOU AS MUCH AS INTRODUCING YOURSELF TO THAT WOMAN. HONESTLY, I MET YOUR PARENTS. THEY WEREN’T THAT BAD. THIS IS ALL YOUR INVENTION, IN YOUR HEAD.”

Ron: “What if she doesn’t like me? I’ve always been awkward around girls- Women I mean.  I mean, aw hell.”

Death: “RON, YOU’RE THE LAST MAN ON EARTH. SHE’S THE LAST WOMAN. THINK MAN! WHAT COULD YOU POSSIBLY DO TO MAKE MATTERS ANY WORSE?”

Death: “BESIDES NOT GOING OVER THERE AND INTRODUCING YOURSELF.”

Ron: “I don’t know, guys. Maybe I need to think of a good opening line. One I can practice.”

Death: “DAMN IT, RON. THIS ISN’T WHAT DEATH DOES.”

Death: “WE’RE IN THE BACKGROUND. NEVER SEEN. WE AREN’T MATCH MAKERS.”

Death: “BUT WITHOUT LIFE THERE IS NO DEATH.”

Death: “YOU MUST PROCREATE.”

Ron: “What’s the point? So our kids will raise a family of inbreds?”

Death: “THAT’S REALLY NEITHER HERE NOR THERE TO US, RON.”

Death: “OH HO! THERE’LL BE SOME FREAKS AT FIRST, TO BE SURE. BUT AFTER A FEW GENERATIONS, IT ALL KIND OF SHAKES OUT.”

Death: “MOSTLY SHAKES OUT. THERE’S ALWAYS A FEW GENETIC ‘PROBLEM CHILD’ ABNORMALITIES THAT POP UP IN THE MIX.”

Death: “YEAH, YOU’LL STILL HAVE POLITICIANS.”

Death: “KHEEE!!! HEH! HEH! YOU KILL ME!”

Death: “HEH! HEH!”

Death: “BUT SERIOUSLY: WE DON’T CARE HOW SMART OR SICKLY HUMANS ARE.”

Death: “WE DON’T JUDGE.”

Death: “AND SINCE YOU’RE THE ONLY MAN STILL ALIVE, NEITHER WILL SHE. YOU PRETTY MUCH CAN’T GO WRONG.”

Death: “WELL, EXCEPT FOR THAT TIE. UGH! THAT TIE!”

Death: “YOU JUST TOLD HIM WE DON’T JUDGE.”

Death: “… AH… I’M COMPLEX.”

Ron: “Yaaaahhh!!!”

Death: “HEY! SHH! SHUT UP!!!”

Ron: “You’re both driving me crazy!”

Death: “SHE HEARD YOU, YOU FREAK! YOU WANT HER TO THINK THE LAST MAN IS SOME RAVING MANIAC?”

Ron: “This is delusion! I’m not talking to death or deaths! I’m losing my mind! You’re not real! None of this is-!”

Slow And Painful Death suddenly pushes Ron’s head into the wall.

Ron: “OW! Shit!”

Death: “THERE. THAT WILL EXPLAIN YOUR NOISE. TELL HER THE BUMP IS BECAUSE YOU HURT YOUR HEAD.”

Ron: “You Did  hurt my head! Damn! I’m bleeding.”

Death: “NO, ‘YOU HURT YOUR HEAD’. NOW GET OVER THERE AND MAKE WITH THE SMOOTH TALK.”

Death to the Left pushes Ron out into the light. The woman sees him stumble toward her.

Death: “GOOD THINKING. REASON DIDN’T WORK WITH THAT GUY.”

Death: “BULL BY THE HORNS AND ALL. WELL, THAT’S THAT. THE DOMINOES ARE FALLING AS THEY USED TO SAY.”

Ron (to woman): “Uh, hi, m’am.”

Woman: “M’am? Tch! The name is Tracy. Do you know you’re bleeding? Quite a bump.”

Ron wipes some of the blood away with his palm. Looks at his bloody hand and wipes it on his pants. Tracy watches all of this, judging.

Ron: “Yes, uh… I bumped my head.”

Tracy: “Obviously.”

Ron: “I… I’m Ron.”

Tracy (sarcastically): “I asked?”

Unsure, Ron looks back to the two deaths in the shadows. They throw up their bony arms in disbelief.

Death (whispering): “Oh! Don’t Draw Attention To Us, You Ass!”

Tracy: “What are you looking at? You have friends back there?”

Ron: “What? Oh no. No. I’m the last man on earth.”

Tracy pulls a cigarette out of her purse. Ron fumbles in his pockets, looking for matches or a lighter, though he knows he has neither. Tracy wags a finger at him, a lighter in her palm, and deftly lights her cigarette.

Tracy: “Last man on earth, huh? God must hate me.”

Slow on the uptake, Ron chooses to laugh, cautiously. The two Deaths, standing in the dark, cannot believe what they’re hearing.

Tracy: “So tell me, am I the last woman on earth?”

Ron: “Yes. We’re the only ones left.”

Tracy: “Uh huh. And just how do you know this?”

Ron: “Death told me.”

The cigarette nearly drops from Tracy’s mouth. The two deaths face palm.

Death: “Oh For The Love Of -!”
Death: “Can You Believe This?”

Tracy takes the cigarette from her mouth, swats away an errant bug attracted to the flame.

Tracy: “Death told you.”

Ron: “Both of them.”

Tracy: “Really. Well, I’ll tell you what.”

Tracy draws a pistol from her purse.

Tracy: “You scurry right back over there to your shadows and I’ll leave you to this filthy dump. I catch you following me and I’ll pop one of these lead berries right into that bleeding bubble on your bean. Got that?”

Ron nods nervously, backing up and staring in terror at the gun barrel.

Death: “WELL, WE HAD A GOOD RUN. AT LEAST WE’RE STILL THE DEATH OF THE LOWER LIFE FORMS.”

Death: “THOSE TWO ARE THE LOWEST LIFE FORMS. CAN WE BREAK WITH TRADITION FOR ONCE AND JUST PUT THEM OUT OF THEIR MISERY? NOW?”

Death: “ONLY IF I GET RON.”

Death: “Damn! UH… ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS?”

Death: “YEAH, SURE.”

END

Story by E.C. McMullen Jr.

Who did my blog art? I’ve no idea. All the meme generators seem to carry it, but even if it’s in the Public Domain, I’d at least like to credit the artist. Does anyone know?


wb2016Make sure you have plenty to read for the end of the world. Buy my book,
WILLOW BLUE.
It’s my second collection of critically acclaimed Supernatural and Drama Thriller short stories with all of the Weird Sex, True Love, Monsters and Mayhem, you’ve come to expect (or should by now). Available in paperback for $8.00 or in Kindle for only $1.99. Buy the paperback at Amazon and the Kindle eBook is free! The tales will last you longer than latte!

Apocalypse not coming soon enough to suit you? Stock up then.

PERPETUAL BULLET: A Science Fiction Collection.
It’s a veritable trove of previously published Science Fiction Horror Thriller tales – plus bonus stories
Featuring: Weird Sex, True Love, Monsters and Mayhem!
Now on sale for $9.00 in Trade Paperback and in eBook for $1.99 and available for your Android Tablet, iPad, Kindle, Nook, and every other “E”!
Find it at (Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Diesel, !ndigo, iTunes, KoboBooks, Smashwords, WHSmith, and more).
Buy the paperback at Amazon and the Kindle eBook is free!

Fill that shelf space

Look for my story Cedo Looked Like People, in the anthology, FEAR THE REAPER, edited by Joe Mynhardt. Available from Crystal Lake Publishing and available in Print for $12.99 or eBook for $2.99.

Record the event for future colonists from other worlds!

Also available from Crystal Lake Publishing, the film making guidebook, HORROR 201: The Silver Scream. Reap the rewards of movie making experience from the likes of Myself, as well as  John Carpenter, Tom Holland, Jeffrey Reddick, George A. Romero, Keith Arem, Richard Gray, also the late  Ray Bradbury, Wes Craven, plus many more. $19.99 in Print or $3.99 in eBook.


I AM A WRITER

WriterThey are the parts I love and the parts I hate.

They are the parts I admire and the parts I fear.

They are the parts I strive to be and the parts I’m ashamed of possessing.

They are the parts I’m glad I am and the parts I wish I never was.

They are the greatness I’ve achieved and the horrors I’ve committed, and all the beetling middles in between.

They are my public bravery and my private cowardice.

They are all the times I stood up for something and all the times I backed away.

They are the times I immediately knew I was the good guy, and the times I learned too late, that I was the bad guy.

They are my loyal heart and my roving eye.

They are my light, that I’ve learned to distrust.

They are my darkness, that I’ve learned to accept.

They are my compassion and my cruelty.

They are my truth. This is my honesty.


SCARY CLOWNS

didyouknoPersonally, I love clowns and don’t find them scary at all. But a meme is a meme, so…

Igor: It’s vorking, doktor! Ve haf successfully murdered da souls of untold number of children! Der fear uv clowns is spreading like virus mitout us! Der terror has truly taken on a life of its own!
Doktor: Gott in himmel, gud henchmen are so hard to vind!
Igor: Denk you, Doktor!
Doktor: Und you’re precious!
Igor: … uh… vhat?
Doktor: YES! You are correct, Igor!
Igor: Vhat iss das about der prec-?
Docktor: BUT! Ve haf not fully eradicated der love of puppies. Ve must terrify dem to da point of der kinder killing dogs und puppies on sight, until only der love of cats remain!
Mistress: Here kitty! Kitty! Kitty!
Doktor: Oop! I must go! It’s dinner time! Ve vill pick dis up tomorrow night.
Igor: Vhat are ve doing tomorrow night?
Mistress: Kitty! Kitty! Kitty!
Doktor: Der same ting ve do every night! Try und take over da VORLD!

The Mickey Mouse roll call for spotted references sounds off now.