Lemme tell you something…

LIFE NARRATED BY SAMUEL L. JACKSON

SLJI had Samuel narrating my life for a while (I won a radio contest), but I had to fire him. He kept saying “Motherfucker” even around my Mom. Once in reference TO my Mom!

Samuel: “Mmmmm! Fresh god damn homemade biscuits? Well check out Motherfuckin’ Mom, here, doing it right!”
Me: “Dude! What the hell, man? Time and place!”
Samuel: “What?!? OH! Oh… Yeah. I know, man, I … know. It’s mothe- it’s hard sometimes.”
Me: “Seriously?”
Samuel: “I think I need help.”
Me: “Well go get that help man. I’m letting you go.”
Samuel: “A motherfuckin’ brother says he needs help, and you’re just gonna cut the motherfucker loose?”
Me: “Damn it, Sam! My Mom’s right there!”
Samuel: “Apologies Mrs. A, but that is one cold Motherfuckin’ way to treat a Nig-”
Me: “GET THE HELL OUT NOW!”

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